...been a while

My apologies for the long silence from me in this medium. Today is the first day I have felt well enough to write. Round 3 seems to be taking its toll on me in a way the other rounds were unable to. Whether it is the sheer amount of chemo in my system or if my body is fighting some sort of bug, its been a tough week.

This past weekend, some of my lovely college friends visited. It was fun to see them and have conversations that warmed the soul. I almost felt "normal" for a short period of time. All weekend I was tired, but could not sleep. Had feelings of nausea, but more feeling at any time I would vomit. The feeling of fatigue took a new level when I was unable to sleep more than 30-45 minutes at a time for 5 days in a row. The feelings of being strung out and weak were imminent.

I was able to hang out with friends and take small walks in the neighborhood. We made some memories together and more importantly I was able to have good, heart warming conversations with all of them. Its amazing to see how far we have all come in the last 10 years (gasp! 10 years since my freshman year of college).

The chemo brain continues to consume me into this week. I would love for my words to be elegant, but this is what I am capable in this moment. So, I am being true to that. I have been very loved by the people around me here in Portland and for that I am grateful. I am working on a host of thank you notes; so stay tuned if you recently sent something my way.

I have a doctors appointment tomorrow where we should get some sort of plan for the last round of treatment and maybe some new ways to manage the lack of sleep and onset of "vomit" feeling. I will be sure to update you all soon.

As always, thank you for your faithful thoughts and prayers. There is a dim light at the end of the tunnel. I am working to build up strength for that final round this week and next.

friends!